The Unspoken Side of Grief: Navigating the Physical Discomfort

Grief - a universal human experience - is associated with emotional and mental challenges.

However, one aspect that tends to be overlooked is the profound physical aspect of grief.

In this discussion, we shine a light on this ‘not very often talked about’ part of grief, and we’ll show you why grief is not just emotionally intense, but also physically demanding.

Understanding the Physical Aspect of Grief

Grief entails more than emotional turmoil; it takes a significant toll on our bodies that adds to its complexity. Loss triggers not only emotional and mental responses, but also there is a physical component that is always associated with grief that contributes to the discomfort and difficulty in effectively processing the emotion.

Biological Coupling: Our Connection to the World

As biological beings, humans are constantly structurally coupled to various elements of life – people, places, situations. This structural coupling occurs with our homes, workplaces, family members, friends, and more.

Throughout our daily lives, we continuously experience varying degrees of structural coupling, forming connections that shape our sense of belonging. It is a biological aspect of how we navigate the world and our everyday lives. Structural coupling is energy in bonding.

Grief and Structural Uncoupling

When grief enters the picture, a profound process of structural UN-coupling takes place. Loss results in a significant and often physically painful disconnection from people, places, or situations that were once integral to our lives.

This biological uncoupling, and how it feels in our physical body, plays a crucial role in the intensity and discomfort of grief.

The Challenge of Navigating Physical Uncoupling

Acknowledging and understanding the physical component of grief is essential for comprehending why grief feels so challenging.

The discomfort arises not only from the emotional void but also from the tangible, physical sense of disconnection that accompanies whatever loss you are going through.

Supporting Your Body as You Grieve

Some ways to support your body when you are in a grieving process:

• Light exercise. Walking and gentle movement is a great way to help our body process grief. When grief feels physically really hard, it can be tempting to want to retreat and curl up. Light exercise and gentle movement at these times can make a huge difference in how quickly you process through the physical discomfort. Walk your dog or ask a friend or family member to come over once a day to take a walk with you. Stretching or yoga can also have huge physical benefits. 

• Vitamins and minerals. Your body needs all of the good vitamins and minerals possible during times of grief. Try a whole-foods daily supplement or try increasing your magnesium intake. Green smoothies and juices are also a great way to get essential vitamins and minerals.    

• Find new connections. If you are grieving a relationship - whether because of a breakup or death or another reason - it is important to start engaging with new connections to support our bodies as it adjusts. New connections with people creates new energetic bonding. This gives our bodies new people and new possibilities to start bonding with. 

• Time. The physical discomfort WILL ease with time. The most intense form of physical uncoupling is death, because it is sudden and drastic. Be kind to yourself. Have compassion. With time, the physical body will adjust to the new circumstances. 

Breaking the Silence: Addressing Grief Holistically

By bringing attention to the physical side of grief, we break the silence on this crucial part of what is going on when we are experiencing grief. If or when we think that the emotion of grief is just mental and emotional, we aren’t seeing the whole picture. And this limits our ability to be effective with how we process grief.

But, when we recognize the impact of structural uncoupling, it brings the whole picture into focus. It's not just about emotional healing, but also about finding ways to process the tangible physical aspects of loss. It is vital that we support our physical bodies when we are grieving. 

Conclusion: Embracing a Comprehensive Approach to Grief

Grief is a multifaceted experience that has non-physical and physical layers. When we overlook the physical aspect, it slows down our ability to process grief.

When we have a better understanding of the biological uncoupling that occurs during grief, it allows us to acknowledge the physical side of grief, and navigating grief becomes a more holistic process.

This opens the door to a more comprehensive approach to healing and finding solace amid loss.